The 4 Most Secret Secret Societies


Everyone has heard of The Illuminati and The Freemasons which basically makes them the worst secret societies ever. Here’s a shocking, one-of-a-kind, conspiracy-collapsing list of the most influential, occult secret secret societies that you’ve never heard of…until now.

secret1 The GottSch├╝rzen
Also known as: The Waiters, God’s Bellhops, and The Alan Parsons Project
Organized in 1901: Berlin, Germany. Specializing in Control of food, drinks and seating of humanity.
Motto: “Darf ich Ihre Bestellung aufnehmen” (Your will be done, to serve and give)

secret3 Vieilles Chaussures et Barbes
Also known as: Pins and Needles, Order of the Shoe, Barbs, PepsiCo
Organized in 1928: Paris, France. Specializing in sitting in dark rooms thinking about women’s ankles and child-murder.
Motto: “Je vais vous frapper avec cette chaussure” (I will do what I must with what I walk upon)

secret2 The Enriques
Also known as: Shush-hushers, More old white guys
Organized in 1919: The North African coast. Specializing in the destruction of everyone not one of them. Creators of High Fructose Corn Syrup
Motto: “hulle doodmaak” (Everyone must be destroyed)

secret4 The Nameless
Organized in Year Unknown: Location Unknown. Activities Unknown
Motto: Unknown